Ten
Tips for Surviving and Recovering from Job Loss
(or Any Other Loss)
Deborah
R. Brown, MBA, MSW
December, 2003
In
the past two years many people have lost their jobs. And for some
they have also lost their reason for getting up in the morning.
What's the rush? They have all day to accomplish the few things
on their "to-do" list.
So
they stop exercising. And they get up late. And they wonder how
they would ever be able to work full-time again and still have
time to go to the dentist and run errands.
No
time to exercise, but plenty of time to overeat?
It's
that old saying that the busiest people get the most done. I find
that with myself as well. When I am busy, my life becomes very
structured with meetings and phone calls. When I am less busy,
there is less structure and more time to goof-off. Sometimes after
a period of great activity or emotional stress, we need time to
rest. But even then we benefit from maintaining our daily routines,
the ones that keep us grounded.
This
can happen when you are in a personal crisis, as well as a job
crisis. These are the times when we must exercise some discipline.
1.
Maintain your routines. Get up at the same time and go to bed
at the same time, even though you are not working. Stay busy.
Use any extra time you might have to clean out closets and get
organized. Are there projects around the house that need your
attention?
2.
Keep to your regular exercise regimen. If you did not exercise
before you lost your job, now is a good time to start. Do something
you enjoy - play basketball, or tennis, join a gym and get a personal
trainer, take up yoga. There are all sorts of exercise options
today. And exercise is a great stress reliever.
3.
Eat regular, healthy meals. Focus on getting good nutrition to
help you in these stressful times. Try to limit "comfort
food."
4.
Set daily and weekly goals for your job search and recovery. Focus
on the results you want to accomplish. Don't spend all your time
sitting in front of the computer (or the TV). Job search is a
contact sport. Get out of the house! It will help your morale
as well.
5.
Plan the activities you resist the most for the first part of
the day. Reward yourself at the end of the day for all you have
accomplished. Plan a special dinner with your favorite foods,
or rent a movie.
6.
Set goals for your personal life as well. Make social plans with
friends every week.
Make a list of things you like to do but have not done in a long
time. Make time for those activities. Just because you aren't
working doesn't mean you can't have fun!
If money is an issue, there are lots of low-cost activities. Hiking,
playing games, or organizing a pot-luck supper are fun and inexpensive.
7. Be gentle with yourself. Don't push too hard, but get "in
the flow."
9.
Surround yourself with positive people, those who can support
your efforts.
10.
Be persistent. As you work your plan, reevaluate it and make changes
when necessary.
How to Make the Career Changes You Want Sooner (rather than later)
Deborah
R. Brown, MBA, MSW
March 19, 2004
Prospective clients often ask me, “How long does the career counseling/coaching process take?”
Part of the answer has to do with the kind of changes you want to make: a minor transition versus a major career change, developing a career development plan or improving your own job performance. There are many other factors as well. The traditional rule of thumb for finding a job is that it takes one month for every 10K that you want to make.
The recent economic recovery has been referred to as a “jobless recovery.” This means that there are fewer jobs than there were in the boom of the 90’s. Fewer jobs also equates to more competition for jobs. And the job search process may take longer as well depending on the kind of job you want, your salary requirements and your skills.
This makes it even more important that you follow the rules of action I suggest:
• Be clear about what you want. Have a vision and set some goals with dates of achievement. But be realistic and flexible as well. Make adjustments when needed.
• You have to know what you want before you can develop a plan to get there. The assessment process is crucial. Know what you need to be successful. And it’s not just about the kind of job you want and how much money you want to make. It’s also about lifestyle. The job has to fit into the life you want. This is your opportunity to create that life.
• Focus all of your efforts in the direction of those goals. Anthony Robbins calls it
“taking massive action.” Massive action is exactly what it takes. This is a part- time job and should be treated accordingly.
• Be persistent. The clients of mine who achieve their dreams are those who know what they want and who persist despite discouragement. Persistent people make the phone calls. Even if people do not call them back. They don’t give up. They keep a clear vision of what they want and continue with the process even if things go slowly.
I have often remarked to my clients, “What is the alternative?” (to not taking action). If the pain of not taking action is strong enough, chances are you will continue to move forward. But you also have to see pleasure in what is ahead of you. The life you envision is better than what you have now!
• I can’t emphasize enough the role of keeping a positive mental attitude. This does not mean constantly having a smile on your face. Nor does it mean that you never have a bad day. It means that despite discouragement, you persist and expect a positive outcome. It means living with the uncertainty and expecting something wonderful, even if you are not sure what that is.
“If you can find a path with no obstacles,
it probably doesn't lead anywhere.”
Frank A Clark, author
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are
